A Divine Transformation

Life started getting better for me, I was much happier and fulfilled. I even lost some weight, I felt and looked great. I started school and work about two months after I received my acceptance letter in the mail. I moved to Baltimore, MD and shared an apartment with my sister and cousin. Even though I was evicted from my previous apartment, I didn't end up homeless. Everything work out in perfect timing, we found an apartment as soon as I had to leave the other one...isn't God faithful? 

I instantly started flourishing in the Master's of Public Health program, for the first time in my life I was an 'A' student. I was shocked when my colleagues would come and ask me for help, it was new to me. I knew for sure that I was at the right place at the right time. Before starting the program, I prayed for wisdom. I made up my mind to stand out and not to just "get by". At that time in my life, I knew that I was not a failure and that I had the spirit of God within me, teaching me all things. I put my all into it and trusted God to do the rest.

I'd pray before studying and prayed before every assignment and exam, I didn't take my education lightly as I did in the past. It is also worthy to note that this time around, I was actually studying what I was passionate about, that made a huge difference. Imagine, I even got an 'A' in bio statics and was asked to be the teaching assistant the following semester, prior to that I always failed math courses, it was definitely beyond me. 

During my time in Baltimore, God began to deal with me in various ways. He began preparing me for the future. For example, I was used to living alone so I always kept to myself while at home. My roommates were not happy about that, it became an issue so I had to adjust. I had to make out time to hang out with them, talk with them, etc. It was not easy but it was necessary. The Lord revealed to me that he was preparing me for marriage (this is about 1 year after the breakup). 

Another thing that the Lord dealt with me on was my cooking! Anyone that knew me then, knew that my cooking was horrible (especially my Nigerian dishes). It was so bad that when my dad visited me, he always had to order food. I began to look up recipes online and try them out. My roommates were my guinea pigs, at times I'd get past and sometimes an epic fail. 

One day one of my pastors at church mentioned how she'd ask the Holy Spirit to help her out in everything such as her dressing. It amazed me, I decided to try it out. I'd ask the Holy Spirit to help me choose an outfit and help me while cooking and in no time, those areas both change drastically. 

The Lord also dealt with me on the issue of anger. I had a very short temper and would say and do some hurtful things while angry. I became studying the Bible on having a meek and quiet spirit. I learned how to respond instead of reacting. I learned to pause, take a breath and think before speaking. I learned to manage my tone. I didn't realize how bad it was until one of my male friends drew my attention to it. We were outside church one day having a conversation and I overreacted. He told me that as a woman, I needed to chill. I was taken aback and went to work ASAP.

Another thing that I had to work on was my mindset. I had to learn how to trust people again. The Lord began to teach me how to look past people's flaws and love them. I had to learn how not to be judgmental or overly critical. At that time, I had a 'poverty mentality', I saw the bad in everything. I didn't believe in favor, I didn't believe that people could be good to you without wanting anything. I was disappointed by so many people so it was extremely difficult at first.

The Lord also began to teach me how to be a Godly wife. I got several books on relationships and marriage, I had a bookshelf full of them. I was determined to get it right the next time around. He taught me about submission and honoring my husband. He taught me how to develop the qualities that I desires in my spouse, such as: selflessness, affection, having a good personality, etc. 

One of the greatest changes that I experienced during this time was liberty. I became free from all the things that held me bound in the past. As I began to study the bible on who I was in Christ Jesus and what he did for me on the cross, I fell in love with me. I realized as a member of the royal priesthood I couldn't do certain things. I was no longer interested in sexual immoral things, I said bye, so long, and farewell to porn, masturbation, and premarital sex. I stopped drinking and partying. I tried to stop all these things in the past but failed woefully, this time around I learned to fellowship with the grace of God and silence the voice of the devil. I learned that it all began with my thoughts, so when negative thoughts came I replaced them with what the Word of God said concerning that particular issue. 

It was a bitter sweet season for me. The Lord stretched me beyond my imagination. A part of me wanted to remain stuck in my ways while another part knew that it was time for change. Change was not easy, but with the Holy Spirit I evolved gracefully. Within a short period of time, I changed drastically. I didn't recognize myself anymore. A church member approached me one day and asked me what happened to me. She said I was happier and more confident, I just smiled. It was hard to explain but it was the Lord at work in me. 

Every area of my life was great but there was one area that saddened me when I thought about it...I was still single, I wanted to be in a relationship, I wanted to be loved...I had a plan, I would be married at the age of 25, have my first child by 27...but 25 showed up and I was still single...I was not happy.



You're blessed!


- Bunmi


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