Shapes, Sizes and Surprises

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Being a stay at home mom/housewife wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. Having to cater to my daughter's needs every second, keeping the house clean, cooking, keeping up with blogging, keeping up with extended family and friends and praying/interceding for a number of hours daily was a lot. At times I felt like a shadow of myself; everyday became a long-boring-tedious routine. I missed my friends that still lived in Maryland; I missed having a social life. We only had one car so when my husband was at work, I was stuck at home. The best I could do was to take my daughter to the park since it was walking distance; me not being a fan of the heat, didn't help matters, we spent more time at home than the outdoors.

I had also gained a lot of weight; the baby weight stuck on way after the baby was delivered. I wasn't happy about it, but I found myself too exhausted to do anything about it. I was also breastfeeding, I was told that it would help with losing weight but I found myself eating more. It seemed like I was always hungry! The extra pounds made me uncomfortable; it affected the way I dressed. I remembered when I first got married; I would make efforts to look 'appealing' before my husband came home from work. However, during my housewife days I found comfort in loose fitting clothing. My husband never complained but it bothered me.

About a month into moving into our new place, our spiritual parents (pastors) came to visit us. It was so good having them around. I was glad that we had a comfortable place for them to stay when they came. We had an awesome time during their visit; it was refreshing and rewarding. One day while we were chatting with them, they asked us what things were coming to our heart about doing ministry in the U.S. We shared the impressions that we had on our hearts and they made comments; mainly agreeing with us. Then they hit us with a BOMB! They told us that they were praying and God laid it on their hearts for us to start the church ASAP.

They asked for a response and we both basically started rambling; yet we agreed. A couple of weeks after that, we had our first service in our living room. There were 8 adults and one child (our daughter) in attendance. The service was awesome; it was obvious that it was time for us to start. Even though we didn't feel like we were ready; we were still trying to settle in and determine our new rhythm. But God had other plans, and it was wisdom to go with his flow and not our feelings. It became clear that God work out the house situation for this reason also; it was all starting to make more sense.

Shortly after that, I decided to stop making excuses and start work out and eating healthier. It started off slow but I kept at it. I also stopped breastfeeding after my daughter turned one so I couldn't blame it on the baby any longer. I messed up by overeating during the holidays- thanksgiving and Christmas but I got back at it once the New Year kicked off. Making efforts to lose weight gave me something else to focus on; I was always between being bored and being overwhelmed. I felt stuck and I just wanted to more forward career wise and financially but I had to sit still and obey; that was hard, because I liked to be in the move. To me then, "no movement meant no progress"; I had to learn to be still and trust God. I had to learn to enjoy every moment because they wouldn't last. I had to learn to focus on my daughter, being able to stay with her and watch her grow was something that I'd come to appreciate later on. I had to learn that I wasn't defined by a job title but by a purpose which consisted of specific tasks/assignments per time.

On most days, I made the best of it; on other days, my feelings got the best of me.



With lots of love,



- Bunmi Adebiyi


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