Supernatural Woman III: Pregnant and Stressed

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Hello! Thanks for stopping by today!

In this new post, I will continue the pregnancy story of my first born.

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Even though it was temporary, living in my parent's house as a pregnant married woman felt odd. It would have been fine if it was just for a short visit, but I had to be there for a few months. To top it off, my husband wasn't there. With each passing day, I missed my husband more and more. It was great being with my family but it wasn't the same. And it was obvious; my dad would jokingly tease me saying that I apparently couldn't live without my husband.

Another thing that got to me was that I stayed home most of the time. I was used to being very active, running my own show-being the queen of my own castle. Even though doing ministry could be quite demanding; I also missed my church family, I missed ministering, I missed the prayer meetings, vigils, etc. The only time that I left the house was for my prenatal doctors' visits; there were a few rare occasions where I went to the store or mall, etc. To make matters worse, it was so cold! After living in Nigeria for a little over two years, I was not feeling the cold weather AT ALL!!!

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As mentioned in my previous post, a few days before leaving Nigeria, I started bleeding. The bleeding continued after I arrived in the U.S. but I held on to my faith. I didn't tell anyone what was going on because I didn't want them to panic and instill their fear into me. Shortly after I settled in, the bleeding stopped completely; I was relieved. I also went to the doctor within that same week and I was told that all was well with me and my baby.

About one week after my first doctor’s appointment, I had my first ultrasound in the U.S., it was so surreal. The image that I saw on the screen actually looked like a baby now. Prior to then, I could barely make out anything; but now I saw limbs, etc. It was so beautiful! However, It hurt that my husband was not there to share this and many other precious moments with me. This ultrasound also confirmed the sex of my baby; it was a girl! I was originally told that it was a girl in Nigeria but I secretly hoped that they were wrong. I always envisioned that my first child would be a boy.  So, they were right after all… it was a girl, I remember sitting at the bus stop stunned; I already had a male name picked out and I addressed my baby by that name daily.

I called my husband and he told me to relax and laughed it off. When I informed my parents and siblings, they all laughed also. I was the only one that didn't find it funny. I eventually got over my initial shock and began to mentally prepare for my baby girl. By the time I started shopping for baby items, I was beyond excited at all the pretty girly things. I finally accepted that I was having a baby girl...it's not like I had a choice anyway. 

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I arrived in the United States in August, my husband and I were praying that he would be here by the following month since my due date was at the end of October. My birthday was also in September, I was looking forward to spending it with him; since it would be our last birthday celebration alone. Well that never happened, and as each day passed by without knowing when he'd arrive, I got more and more stressed. We were waiting for him to get his VISA and we initially applied over a year ago. It was so frustrating, with each call and check online for a status update, I got annoyed. I wasn't supposed to be going through this journey alone! 

One day my father told me to relax, he said "The reason why he is still in Nigeria is because God wants him there; he can't just leave the church like that. There is something that he needs to take care of before leaving. Let him at least spend Christmas with them." In my head, I thought "yea whatever" (lol..I blame the pregnancy hormones for my rude behavior).  Shortly after that statement, I knew that my father was right. Something’s happened at church that my husband had to resolve. A few weeks after the issue was resolved, we got a status update. My petition for his VISA had been approved!!!

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However, the stress from the whole process started to take a toll on me. I went in for a routine doctor's visit and discovered that my blood pressure was high coupled with my feet being very swollen. Which was a huge concern for the doctor, she was concerned about preeclampsia. She told me that I had to be admitted to the hospital right away so that they could monitor me. When she left the room, the nurse came in and told me that my blood pressure wasn't too high and that I could decline the doctor's order.

I decided to do that and the doctor was livid. I told her that I have spoken to my husband and we’ve decided that I should just go home and rest. She started saying how bad of a decision that was, she said I or my baby could suffer from organ damage she went on and on until she said that myself and I could possibly die. "What's the point? You're already 38 weeks, having the baby now would be just fine."  When I didn't bulge, she got harsher and harsher but I couldn't be moved. I had peace with my decision and my faith in God was solid.

I told her that I would be monitoring my blood pressure at home and asked what would be considered normal for me at this point. She proceeded to say that she would not tell me anything, because I had made my decision and that I should live with it. I responded with a smile and a "thank you".  I signed the paperwork that stated that I was rejecting service and going against medical advice. That day, I made up my mind to prove her wrong and to ensure that she wouldn't be the one to deliver my baby.

To be continued...

With lots of love,



- Bunmi


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